I’m sure you’ve heard the expression “he got out of the wrong side of bed this morning”. We use it to describe people who are grumpy or irritable. I think we all have days when we make heavy weather of things. And yet on other days, everything seems to be a breeze. This article is about practical things you can do to manage your mood.
There are those who say that it is possible to choose your mood. They contend that your mood is a consequence of an act of will. You can override negative feelings and choose to have a bright, cheery outlook.
On the other hand, there are those who think we are at the mercy of whatever life throws at us. They see mood as connected to external events. For them, happiness is short-lived and fragile. When they’re happy, it’s as if they’re walking a tightrope, and a gust of wind could push them off into negativity and gloom.
I tend towards the first position, but think that the assertion that you choose your mood is a bit stark for most of us. It’s particularly difficult if there is a strong cause for pain or distress in your life. We have to live with and through those feelings. But in everyday life, I think there are some practical things that we can all do to help urge ourselves towards a positive outlook and optimism.
For me it’s important to eat. If I’m hungry, I become ratty, and that’s that. It’s amazing how even the first few mouthfuls of food transform my outlook. Once I’ve got some food inside me, the world looks completely different.
Sleep is also important. There are some good tips on sleeping well on the BBC health website http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbody/sleep/articles/advicetips.shtml Tiredness makes it more difficult to lift our mood, so getting a good night’s sleep is key to keeping our mood positive.
But if we’ve slept well, and have got food in our stomach, then I believe that, in the normal run of things, our mood is largely down to us. We can choose to take a positive, optimistic outlook on life, or we can choose to get into a flap. Spending time outdoors, taking part in activities that engage us and enjoying time with other people usually help our mood.
I outline below some practical things you can do to help keep your mood positive. You might also find my post, Beat the Blues useful. I think it’s important to think about how we will stay upbeat as the clocks go back.
So can you choose your mood? To a large extent I think you can. See if you can do just that, and get out of the right side of bed, every morning!
Managing your mood: practical tips
1. Be aware
Sometimes we slip into fretting about things or negativity without realising it. Take time out to notice what frame of mind you’re in. Are you wearing a frown? Is your jaw tight? Is your stomach knotted? These are all signs of stress and anxiety. If you become aware of them, you have the opportunity to do something about them.
2. Take action
Action can often be the antidote to worry. Rather than fret about all the things you face, work out what the first step towards solving the problem might be, and do it.
3. Work on your outlook
You may not be able to do anything about external circumstances, but you can do something about your reaction to them. See what happens if you decide to adopt a positive outlook. Are you a glass-half-empty person? If so, what are you going to do about it?
4. Be kind
As those of you who were Smiths fans in the eighties may know, “it takes guts to be gentle and kind”. Kindness really does make a difference, to you, and to those around you. Being kind will boost your mood and take you out of yourself.
5. Smile!
Smiling is infectious. You’ll be surprised how well people respond to you if you catch their eye and smile. Smiling lifts your mood. If you find yourself feeling down, force yourself to smile. It helps you to connect to the reserves of goodwill and positive energy that are within you.
You can learn to manage your mood so that you don’t get dragged down by the cares or worries we all face. Have a go now. With practice you can learn to make sure that you remain positive and upbeat, no matter what life throws at you.
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
Beat the blues
Beat the Blues
You probably don’t need reminding that autumn is well underway. Despite the recent Indian summer, the clocks will go back at the end of this month. The hours of darkness already outnumber the hours of daylight. Within a few weeks it will be dark by mid-afternoon.
Now is a good time to think about what you will do to keep the winter blues at bay. How will you get through the dark nights, rain and cold? This article is about the practical things you can do to ensure your winter wellbeing.
I believe the best way to ensure happiness is to get involved in something that really engages you. You can get short-term highs from all sorts of things, but the most sustained happiness comes through doing something which takes you out of yourself. For me it’s the company of friends, and entertaining. I spend many happy hours in the kitchen preparing food for people. What do you do that makes you lose track of time?
We all need things to look forward to. Make sure that you plan things you like to do throughout the winter months. These may be social, sporting or cultural events. If possible, try to do these things with other people. The company of friends can help to bring us out of ourselves and stop us getting caught in self-pity.
It’s important to exercise well in winter. Simple stretches in the morning can help to get you limbered up to face the day and help to lift your mood. If you spend a lot of time in a car, or at a desk, make sure that you find opportunities to stretch your legs. If you don’t like the rain, get outside when it’s not raining! Exercise doesn’t have to be strenuous. A walk in the park from time-to-time does us all good.
Eat well. It’s easy to say, but sometimes not that easy to do. Try to find foods that give you energy and make you feel good. Have you tried the autumn produce in the shops? Have you tasted the difference between an English apple and one that’s come half way round the world?
Make sure you do things for other people. Selfishness is self-defeating. Eventually people will give up on you if all you think about is yourself. Find ways of engaging with people around you. Do things to help them and see what effect it has on both you and them.
If anything I have written has made you think, I’d love to hear from you. Feel free to call me on 07947 959869 or send me an email. I am offering a free session to anyone interested in exploring how they might use coaching to be happier and more fulfilled. I’d be delighted to hear from you to set a time and date.
Make this autumn a fruitful time of preparation for the long winter nights to come. Enjoy the passage of the season safe in the knowledge that you are ready to face the winter and live life to the full through the dark nights ahead.
Beat the blues: five steps
1. Do what you love to do
What is it that you do that makes you lose track of time? It may be dancing, or the cinema. It could be playing a sport, or entertaining. How much of your time do you actually spend doing it? Make a plan to use the winter months to do whatever it is that you really love to do more often than you have before.
2. Physical activity
What can you do to boost your levels of fitness over the coming months? Are there any clubs you could join? It’s easier to keep fit if you are sharing the experience with others. Is there any way you could incorporate some simple stretches into your morning routine? It’s a good way of limbering up for the day and helping it to go better. You start the day with energy, rather than lethargy. This boosts your immune system and will help you to stave off colds and infection.
3. Eat well
The first step is to notice what you’re eating. This is more difficult if you’re eating it as you walk down the street, surf the net or watch TV. What are you eating? How does it make you feel? You might want to keep a food diary. This is a great way to become aware of exactly what it is that you consume. Note the effects the food has on how you feel, your energy levels and your mood. Try to eat more of the foods that boost you. Cut back on those that leave you feeling lethargic and bloated. You’ll soon notice the difference.
4. Do things for other people
What can you do for the vulnerable around you? How well do you know your neighbours? What can you do to improve relations? Doing things for other people can be a chore, but it’s a good way to get you out of yourself and to stop you from dwelling on your problems.
5. Have things to look forward to
Plan to do some of the things you really like doing over the coming months. Is there something you used to enjoy but don’t do any more? What can you do about it? Find others who might enjoy doing it with you.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
