Great Expectations

I was talking to one of my friends over Christmas about his plans for January. He told me of a work project he was about to embark on. “I know it’s going to be a disaster,” he told me. He then went on to detail how those he was due to work with were going to let him down. He was convinced that January was going to be difficult. And do you know what? He was right.

What we expect to happen has an enormous bearing on what actually happens. I think it’s because our subconscious is tuned to signals that will back up our assumptions.

I imagine most of us have had times when we’ve gone to a party expecting no one to be interested in us. And what happens? Our subconscious detects others’ indifference to us, and it’s as if we’re invisible. On the other hand, when we go to a function expecting to have a good time and be liked, our subconscious will pick up the signs from others that they like us. This helps us to feel good about ourselves, reinforcing our sense of self-worth. People are drawn to us.

It isn’t magic, and nothing can prevent the external and sometimes painful events that challenge us; but our conscious image of the future has an enormous effect on our subconscious and all that it contains.

We can’t stop the way some things happen, but we can choose how we react, how we imagine and how we hope outcomes to be.

What do you foresee for 2008? Same old same old? A mediocre year? Or do you hope for good things? Great expectations!


How to expect the best for 2008, and make it happen

1. Be clear

It’s important to be as clear and precise as possible about what you are hoping for this year. If your goals are specific, you’re much more likely to realise them. In general, I like to go with the flow and trust that things will turn out well. In many areas of my life, I think that is fine, and it works. But in terms of my business goals for 2008, this week I’ve realised that I need to be specific. Without clear goals, the danger is that things will pretty much carry on as they are, when, in fact, in 2008 I want to see my business become even more established and successful than it is already.

2. Use milestones

Now that you’ve got your goals for 2008 clear in your mind, what are the milestones along the way? For me, the process of clarifying what I want to achieve in 2008 has made me focus on what I need to do each month in order to meet my goals. What are your milestones? What can you do to make sure you achieve them? Take one step at a time, and make those steps clear, realistic and manageable. A small but firm step is better than no step at all; or than one that is too big, demoralising us when we don’t make it.

3. Be accountable

The best way to make sure we do something is to be accountable for our actions. Part of the reason coaching works so well is that it provides a framework of accountability for people who want to change their lives. At the very least, write down your goals. Without a written record, they are likely to remain just a nebulous wish list. If you think it will help, share what you hope to achieve with a trusted friend. Alternatively give me a ring and arrange for a free initial consultation. I am happy to hold you to account so that you reach those goals. That’s my job, and I love it!

4. Affirm yourself

It’s important to give yourself positive messages. Resist any off-putting voices in your head that say you can’t do something and replace them with a message of encouragement. For example, if you find yourself thinking “I’m lazy and never make things happen”, try repeating to yourself “I have the determination and application to do this.” Repeat these affirmations as often as you can, and see what a positive difference they make.

5. Persevere

To be fulfilled in life means taking risks. Nothing will be achieved if you don’t act. I believe success comes in cycles. If things aren’t going well, believe that you will come through any difficulties. Keep going. Keep believing in yourself. May your great expectations for 2008 be met.